Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Dusk

So everyone has had their little freak outs tonight.  My brother in law, my sister, etc.
The sun is setting, it's cooling off outside, I'm trying to watch a movie that I really have no idea why I rented it.
Life is filled with disappointments.  We all know this.  We deal with them on a daily. 

You get to a point where you just have to say enough or else you can find yourself at the bottom of a bottle. 
Blogging has been my touchstone the last few years.  My way of trying to deal with dren.   Sometimes I've done a good enough job handling it all, sometimes I haven't.

Spudguns, any idea how often I've sat here typed out something and then deleted it because by the time I got to the end of the post it just seemed pointless?  Too many to count specially in the last 6 months or so. Give or take a day.

Maybe I'm too honest.  I have told too much of myself.  Maybe I haven't even scratched the surface yet?  Who knows.  I just know there are a rare few hours in the day, at dusk and at dawn, when I feel like me.  Like the person I think I should be.  That rare what three hours combine, when I feel connected to the world.   Have no idea why it's that way, but it is.  It's also when I'm the most energized.

So here I am right now, listening to the city outside my bedroom window shift gears from the office day to the drunkenness that passes for nightlife around here.  Wishing I was on a bus headed out of the city limits.

I'm setting a goal for myself.  Goal is to be anywhere but this city by spring. Even if it's only for a week. Seems simple enough to any of you reading, but for someone with money issues and health problems, little tougher.   I wonder where the WWE will be in their Canadian tour by March?
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