Thursday, November 11, 2010

Mr. Shelley You made me cry

I just read this week's issue of the MotorCityMachine Guns! Spike blog (Taking the Torch) and oh my! Alex Shelley made me cry.  No joke, I cried when I read what he had to say.

Then I got mad.  Why, Because he admitted to having an issue with something and then made excuses for it.  DUDE!

I know I am just some random fan on the internet but I am going to say this...  I'm worried. 

If you've been following me for the last year or so on my various blogs, you know that I was teasing Chris Sabin about his hair.  I was asked why I never teased Alex Shelley about anything.  At the time, I did not see any faults in him.  Then I started to watch old footage of him again from 2005/06 and compared it to what he looked like in 2009.  He was about to my naked eye 25 pounds lighter in a bad way.  And we all know cameras add weight to us.  So that means he's even thinner in real life.

I made a comment.  Good or Bad I made a comment about his being too thin. 

But I wasn't the only one around here who thought that. 

Few months ago, Mr. Shelley made a comment in one of his spike blog posts about starving himself. I threw a screw when I saw that. 
Why? I'm just a fan who's never even talked to him personally. I thought it was the wrong thing to say with so many young fans reading.  The wrong thing to say with so many readers who have zero self esteem who take their cues from their heroes.  So, I wrote a short story about binge eating.  My vampire chef story He's Haunting Me on this blog.  And I quoted a line from Mr. Shelley's half of that blog post.  Which I might add to the lady who thought the binge eating scene was a rape that's something I'll rant about another time
Knowing there are impressionable people out there who might be in an emotionally bad place to begin with read that particular post and see Mr. Shelley say he starves himself; they may just say something like "oh it's okay cause Alex Shelley does it too".  It made me mad. 

At the same time, I was reviewing a book on eating disorders by Laine Shaw  where she talks about the fact men with eating disorders do not get diagnosed as easily as women do.  Talk about timing no?

I am a foodie. I'm also someone who has a history of Bulimia.  My weight has yo-yoed from 300pounds to 120pounds to 250pounds to 118pounds to where I am now, 160pounds. Yes, that is right I have no problem admitting my weight. But I am alive to admit it. Had I kept on the way I was going few years ago, I might not be here to admit it.  I had liver problems because of the Bulimia. I now have Acid Reflex like no one's business and lost a tooth because of the vomiting destroying my teeth.

Mine was caused by bad self esteem. It took me nearly 10 years to finally get my own eating disorder under control.

So today, reading Alex Shelley say he thinks he has an eating disorder then brush it off with the comment about the 14 hours... dude. You made me cry, for a good ten minutes you made a fan cry.