Monday, December 20, 2010

3:26pm

I'm ready to kill myself.   Seriously.   I just got a call from my mom who was just laughing and giddy as can be and all she said was "I've got news. Guess what your sister is getting for her gift. It goes on her left hand"

You've got to be frealing kidding me right?  J.'s divorce is months away from being anywhere close to legal yet and their getting officially engaged.  I knew this was in the works for over a year now, as they have been together for nearly 2 and a half years and I already refer to J. as my brother in law.  But this just makes me feel more and more like a useless bucket of dren.

Let me catch you all up....my sister Ninja who is 8 years younger then me, is now engaged. Before me. I'm happy for her, I am.  This is her longest relationship ever.  Normally she was the type who dated a different guy every two weeks, so I sort of knew the relationship was in for the long haul after it made it to the three month mark.

I'm upset for the simple fact my sister who is 8 years younger then I am is getting married before me.
Yes, god damn it I'm beyond jealous on that fact.  This is a woman who's never ever wanted to be married and suddenly poof she is.   She wanted a high paying career and never showed any interest in being "chained down"  as she put it.

Did I mention that my sister is 8 years younger then I am.  Cause if I didn't....

The idea of going to my YOUNGER sister's wedding;  still unmarried myself just makes me want to slice my wrists. I'm done. Done done done.
That's the biggest baddest humiliation the world can throw at a single woman. It wouldn't sting so frealing much if I was in a long term relationship myself, but seriously dude.