Just another Monday Morning

They say that true insanity is doing something over and over again expecting different results.  Okay, then when does routine become insanity?

My morning routine is taking my stomach pills, my pain pills, checking emails, answering any comments on my blogs, and then having coffee before having to get to work on the book reviews.

It's always the same stuff.  Never wavers.   So then, am I insane or just stuck in a rut?
Something to think about on your way to work this morning my Spudguns.

What a crap way to spend time

Morning went okay.  There has been blowing snow and overcast for half the day, now it's full on snowing again.
Had a odd time at the grocery.
Was suppose to have gotten together with my buddy Matt this afternoon but the guy tossed me over the ring apron cause he got a date.  Nice, good to know I'm not even worth a text message for canceling.  When he does get hold of me, he'd better tell me that the damned date went so frealing perfect that he married the chick or something. 

Ended up renting  Ten Inch Hero which was suppose to be a cute little comedy about a bunch of kids working in a sandwich shop.  It ended up not being much of a foodie movie at all, or a comedy for that matter.  Total romantic chick-flick.  Not what I was in the mood for at all. And I hate it when the DVD cover makes it sound like one thing then it ends up being another.
Damn movie made me cry.  Last thing I needed today was a reason to cry. One of the main characters has this big speech about how her looks get her ignored.... yeah too frealing close to home I'd say.

It's the Thank Yous

As a reviewer, you have no time for much of anything if you want to make deadline, you are lucky if the press agents send you single emails instead of mass group ones to all the bloggers/press people, and totally hit the gold if they remember your name.

I've wondered lately if I should keep going after my current stack of books are done, as I do not get paid for this.  I get the books for free but I'm one of hundreds who do not get paid for the hours we put into it.
I missed out on two author interviews in the last few months, because of missed deadlines.

I started doing this to get my foot in the door myself for my own writing career, but sadly, that has not gone as I was thinking it would. Mostly because of the above statement and because I deal with a different intern every two months.

I was seriously wondering about it all, then tonight something nice happened.  The one thing that is rare but makes weeks like this worth it.   A personal thank you from the authors. 
And let me break it down for you,  there are two thank yous that you can get.   A generic "Glad you loved my book"  which means they never read what you had to say about them.  and the real deal.  Like tonight.  I got a paragraph long thank you from Jill Mansell for the review I did on her book "Staying at Daisy's".  A very personal thank you.  I'm still smiling.

Um... honestly

Okay, I finally got down to it and did the short review for the Jamie Oliver cookbook.
If you want to call it that.

I pretty much said I thought the book was a disappointment.   Not the stuff I'm guessing the publisher will be wanting me to say, but tough cookies on that. 

I did love the look of the book, but just not the recipes themselves. Too difficult to find certain items and alot of them are very expensive.

So, that's done. Now I can not feel so much like I am under a pressure cooker (all puns intended) with trying to figure that review out.   Wow, and it only took me what... two months?

And in this corner Eric Young

I used screen capture for this post

Last week's episode (Feb 24 2011) of TNA Impact  had one highlight.  The silliness of Eric Young. 

Okay so I fast forwarded through 90% of last week's Impact. 

Why doesn't Eric Young have his own show?   I'm serious here.  And he broke out the Canadian shorts midway through his "match" which was a happy few seconds for me.  EY is still on my list of Canadian celebrities I would love to meet.
I keep hearing the announcers say how crazy Mr. Yummy... er Mr Young is.  Well, um dude he's Canadian, a Canadian that needs to come back to Canada and sit in the snow for a bit cause he's looking too tanned, but a Canadian none the less. And we're known for our funny.  

Daily Om Lesson

I subscribe to the Daily Om.   It's the first thing I ever subscribed to on the internet when I first got the internet years ago.

Today's lesson is how we as a society have over used the words "I'm Sorry"  to the point they are being used either wrongly or to the point of them not meaning anything anymore.
The lesson asks us to count up in the course of a day how often we say it, and when. 

I decided to do this today. 
I found myself saying "I'm Sorry" every few minutes when I was out. The only place I went today was my mother's. 
So in the course of the ten minutes it took me to get there, I said "I'm Sorry" three times to people I was walking past on the street simply because I was on the sidewalk and they weren't moving over.
I said I was sorry to the lady who was standing outside my mother's building having a cigarette as I reached for the buzzer.
I said I was sorry to the guy in the laundry room who was just waiting around for his laundry when I took the basket of laundry down for mom.
I said I was sorry to the cleaners who were vacuuming the hallway in front of my mother's apartment when I came down the hall.  Okay that time I had muddy winter boots.

That's 6 times today.  If I had stopped to think, it should have been "Excuse Me."  and not I'm Sorry.

I've done, just what the Daily Om Lesson today was expressing.  We, as a society, take the blame for stuff that isn't needing blame. And this in turn, belittles ourselves.

The rest of the Daily Om Lesson talked about discovering what it is about ourselves that makes us feel we need to give up personal power like this.  
Saying "I'm Sorry"  when we've done nothing wrong like this, is the same as saying that we have no right to be where we are. 

I never thought about that before you know. 

Are we playing it safe?

I can honestly say, I have never played it safe when it has come to love/lust. 
Anyone of you my dear Spudguns, who's read any of this blog or my other blogs over the last 7 years can without a doubt agree with me on that statement.

So then why is it, that all the self help books and authors and magazine articles out there have always been on the side of playing it safe?  Take a minute to check my facts... I'll wait.

Over 90% of the stuff out there tells women to not be too loud, not be too out there, not to be too expressive towards the man they are wanting, but to somehow still "be ourselves".   HOW?  I ask you, how can we be less then who we are and still be ourselves?
Men, you can take this theory upon yourselves too, as I know you guys are always told to man up and not be a pussy.

I've had more then a few people in the last two years tell me I'm off my crackers when I say, I know it's my voice that's going to snag a guy not my looks.  And, no I'm not down playing my looks at all.  I know something I say or write will be what grabs the attention of the right guy.  I have just always known this.  I honestly thought growing up I'd end up writing a killer book or working at a magazine/newspaper and that would do it, but now I'm thinking it's going to be my blogging
Simply because that's when I am my most honest and unflustered.

And Spudguns, you are thinking "what has got into her this morning?"  Well, everything actually.  Simply everything.  There was a conversation with one of my cousins about how little response to stuff I've gotten since I changed my attitude and have become "nicer" in the last few months.  P.S., she just finished reading "Why Men Love Bitches"  so I know where her point of view is coming from.
But, I started to think about that, and yes it really got under my skin.  She's half way right. Which is the worst part of it.
I've gone back over a few things, blog wise, and since I've toned down, I've fallen off the radar of a few people. Why is that? 
Is the only way to be noticed to be a Heel around here?